Clutching at straws...

[A-Ro]

(so long as they can be cancelled).

I think you meant &quotas long as they can be cancelled&quot

Ha Ha!

I am now your pedanty alter ego.

[Ancient Colin]

Identity theft! I knew I shouldn't have replied to that RBS Nigeria email promising me enough money to turn my football club around (clearly Wilder has managed to turn the club around ... .

[Ascension Ox]

You're an RBS banker right? Stop wasting time on non league football fora, you're working for me and the shareholders want a dividend pdq..

Not as much as I want my bonus back up to it's proper level.

Count yourself lucky to have a job. Any chance of your employers lending some money to some small businesses while I'm at it?

[GodalmingYellow]

You're an RBS banker right? Stop wasting time on non league football fora, you're working for me and the shareholders want a dividend pdq..

Not as much as I want my bonus back up to it's proper level.

Any chance of your employers lending some money to some small businesses while I'm at it?

Only at very high interest rate margins, and only if the small business owners put their houses up as collateral, and then only if they have loads of equity. Then there will be a substantial set up fee, because it really does honestly cost the bank £2,000 to set up a loan for £20,000.

And let's not forget the £30 fee for a one day late direct debit, because it really does honestly cost £30 to send out a photocopied letter.

The banking ombudsman has the teeth of a jellyfish, and the baking system in this country needs total reform, with proper competition regulations.

[amershamwrighty]

Oooh look - a bandwagon ! Jump on it - quick !

[Hog]

The banking ombudsman has the teeth of a jellyfish, and the baking system in this country needs total reform, with proper competition regulations.

Yeah, more jam in doughnuts for a start!

[GodalmingYellow]

Oooh look - a bandwagon ! Jump on it - quick !

Not another banker.

[GodalmingYellow]

The banking ombudsman has the teeth of a jellyfish, and the baking system in this country needs total reform, with proper competition regulations.

Yeah, more jam in doughnuts for a start!

I prefer ones with caramel shavings on top, and an apple flavoured custard filling... Not that I'm fussy or anything.

[A-Ro]

You're an RBS banker right? Stop wasting time on non league football fora, you're working for me and the shareholders want a dividend pdq..

Not as much as I want my bonus back up to it's proper level.

Count yourself lucky to have a job. Any chance of your employers lending some money to some small businesses while I'm at it?

My employers won't, we're not that sort of bank.